let’s just stop time so i can read all my books without real life interfering
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i’m really just a blessed girl. the load gets heavy. i get tired. God takes over. i find the strength again. and we keep getting better. that’s really just how the story goes.
one of the craziest things I am constantly re learning is that other people can't give you something they don't know how to give themselves. that doesn't make it right or fair, but in some ways it does make it less personal when it IS hurtful. people who think their only value in the world is working will never encourage you to take time off or a break. people who never say no even when they want to won't applaud when you do. people who can't imagine more than what they have now will never believe you when you tell them your dreams. everything we put into the world is a reflection of ourselves and not in a cursed and sinister way, in a honest and true way.
when i didn't think anyone was on my side or believed my feelings, I wasn't capable of having anyone else's back. it wasn't about the situation or how valid their points were, it was the principle of the action to me in my own context that didn't change so nothing passing through it did either.
I think it's extremely natural to want to be understood and to crave reassurance. it's nothing to be ashamed of, and people are not born to walk the world alone. everything we have is because we build it together, and that's why making a commitment to healing yourself and give yourself the life you want over all else should always be your priority if you truly care about the people around you. If you give yourself freedom, understanding, kindness, loyalty, protection...then you are free to give it to another!
don't let your priorities get out of whack. don't go out and buy luxury items or a fancy new car if you have other things to do like make sure your health is right (regular checkups, full panel bloodwork, the dentist, etc.), getting your dream body, paying off high interest debt, working on your career and education, and investing aggressively (especially if you're in your 20s, this is the best decade for compound growth). it's very tempting to buy things for instant gratification (speaking from personal experience!) but the joy you feel doesn't last long. If I could do it again, I would use big ticket items like bags, nice clothes, silk scarves, huge extravagant trips, cars, jewelry, etc. as a reward for when I hit other milestones, such as graduating college, getting a job that skyrockets your income, hitting a certain number in investment accounts or business profits, hitting your goal weight, etc. and trust me, you will value it a lot more when you have put in the work to set yourself up for success.





